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**Deceptive Feelings-**
Below are the 18 most recent journal entries.
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2007.01.30 20.44
Confused Mucho Lots-O
Mann oh mann. How does everything get this messed up. Try and do the right thing and everything goes up in smoke. I know what I need to do..but I just can't. It's not fair. Everytime I do something I always manage to hurt someone. No matter what! Wow I've never wanted a cig so bad in my life. I'm gonna have to find a way to deal with all fo this. When did life get so complicated? One day your an innocent child..the next day your a complete teenage walking disaster! How do you go from being innocent to sinner. I don't understand any of this! I just quit! And that's the end of all I've got to say.
Mood:  confused
Music: Mama, I'm Alright
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2006.03.23 20.29
If I Could
If I could I would take back all the mistakes I've made and make them right again. But I can't so I just gotta deal with each new day.
Mood:  depressed
Music: Garry Talking
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2005.11.30 15.48
Things are messed up
WOW...everythings seems to be messed up these days. Things certainly have not been going well. I don't even know how to describe things anymore..I really don't. I mean it seems like the whole world is mad at me, and that I can never do anything right. I don't know if that's true or not but I mean it's just how it feels. I went to my special little get-a-way over Thanksgiving break..that's prolly been the highlight of my life. Umm lemme think here..hmmmm... Last night took a walk with Maegan she's the greatest bestfriend/sister a girl could ask for. I mean whenever shit sucks, she's there, whenever your ready to just pull your hair out, she's there. She'll never betray me no matter what. And no matter how bad I mess up, I know that'll she'll never judge me, nor hold it against me. That's just how she is, I guess that comes with the territory of 10 yrs. We've had our ups, downs, twists, and turns, and she's never stopped being there for me! Even when we were separated from each other for 8 1/2 months!! 8 1/2 LOOOOOONG months!
She never stopped being there, I know this is one sister I'll die with, and I'd certainly die for her. but anyway back to our walk..yeah we hadn't even gotton 2 blocks from my house and it started pouring down rain, now one would think both of us being smart girls would come home..nope not a chance. We walked around for like an hour in the pouring rain. We let our hair down and it looked sweet all drenched and stuff. We then somehow ended up on Jesse's street, and I showed her his house as as walked by, well then she decided she wanted to go say hi, so we did. We stopped and said hi, Garry was with him, but he went inside after like 10 mins. So it was all good and stuff, not that we didn't want Garry out there with us, it's just weird cuz he use to like Maegan. So yeah we didn't stay for than 15 mins. We left and started walking home, took a picture of her all drenched and stuff and sent it to her "boyfriend". I got home and that was about it. I went to bed in an extremly bad mood, all because hen I got home I got yelled at, so that was what from the time I got home til the time I went to bed..like 2 hours of nothing but getting yelled at. Sometimes people just dont' get it, but I mean there wasn't anything I could do about it, I couldn't talk to anyone, I wasn't aloud on the computer, and it was too late to call everyone including Maegan. So yeah it was a great night, but it had a crappy ending. Well ok I've updated long enough. Good-bye.
</3 Jen
Who do you turn to...
...when everyone's turned their back on you?
Mood: depressed as sual
Music: None
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2005.08.20 13.06
Wow..
So much has happened I don't even know where to start. Today I'm in one of those kick-ass out of my way ain't nothing gonna wreck my mood i'm readii to face everything days! Guess that's a good mood to go to the Conner's party in. Cuz ya'll never know what your gonna see or be involved in when you go to something like that. I was invivted to go to Skate World tonight by Nick R. but I told him I was busy. Besides he might be bringing his little buddies and their little hoes, and I don't wanna be part of that. Plus one of his buddies is my ex-boyfriend and I don't wanna see him TRYING to pick up chicks..although I think it would be REALLY funny to watch him get all rejected like that but yeah whatever. I was planning to go to this party for like ever and so I wasn't about to just blow it off to go out to Skate World and get all pissed and ignored and shit like that. But yeah like i said before whatever. Hopefully everything tonight goes well. I gotta come back online later and tell Hot Topic Geek if I can go with her tomorrow morning. I should be able to..it's sorta something I need to do. But I dunno my mom can be like that sometimes..so again whatever. Well hmm..nothing much is new I'm starting school in like 10 days..this suxs!:-/ here's my school schedule.. as far as i know i no one is in any of my classes. Go figure huh!
1st hour-Civics-Don't know who the teacher is yet
2nd hour-H.Y.P.E-Don't know this one either
3rd hour-Tech Math-Wollese
4th hour-Freshman English-Feikema
5th hour-Computer Application-Rohlman
6th hour-Biology-Gall
7th hour-Basic P.E.-Dean
And I don't know which lunch yet either!! >:o
Anyway..yeah anyway I'm gonna go..I gots places to go and people to do..lol just kidding, ya'll know I ain't like that!
Ya'll come back now,:-D
Froggie
Mood:  ecstatic
Music: Simple Plan-Welcome to my life
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2005.07.31 14.10
The concert, my hoochie sister, and my blonde bestfriend
Ok please excuse those last entries I was trying to put something in my xanga and it wasn't working to totally ignore those entries! Anyway here's what I did last night. Last night I went to a Montgomery Gentry and Bobbi Penison concert with My Hoochie(Maegan), it was a blast! I don't know how long it's been since I laughed that hard, or acted soo crazy. I got over to Maegan's at 5:00 and then we went to her Aunt Connie's then we left for the concert. We got there at like 6:30 so we had a 1/2 hour to kill so we went and got pop and went to the bathroom, then we came back to our spot on the hill and we ate some pizza.Good food that is! Then we went back to the bathroom so make sure there was no food in our teeth then the concert started it was great. But then we left for the bathroom again and on our way back this guy was talking to his friend and as Maegan walked by cuz she was in front of me the guy goes "Love that ass" and Maegan didn't hear him so I had to tell her what she said and we started cracking up. We got back to our seats and watched more of Bobbie Penison..and then during intermission or whatever you wanna call it we got up and went to get pop and go to the bathroom. And more guys were checking her out..plus I had some dude's looking at me but if they said anything I never heard them but that's ok. I like a little mystery in life. The concert started again and Montgomery Gentry came on stage and started singing and Maegan was dancing shaking her ass and all that hoochie stuff he does and started dancing with the little boy standing next to us. He was 7 yrs. old and his name was Frank! It was such a cutie. About half way through the concert Maegan has just been shaking her ass and this guy walks up, he must of be about 17 or 18 and talks to Maegan whose got glow bracelets looped around her earrings and he walks up and goes "I like your earrings" and Maegan was like "what'd he say?" Once again I heard what they said and she didn't. So he tells her again. So goes "oooh thanxs", He asked "where'd you get them", She said "My Aunt bought them for me" He said"Oh well their cute and so are you!" He left and we started cracking up and went back to dancing and being stupid. Then we wer dancing and I almost fell down the hill. I texted Cody during the intermission thingy. I said "whatch up to?" he replied saying "nm I'm at my grandma's" I said "cool", then I replied with "I'm drunk" He said "cool" then I replied saying "Cody I think I'm in love with you" he said "K, well I gotta go though bye" I replied saying "k love ya bye!" Alright now mind you people everyone who knows me knows when I have Mountain Dew in my system I can say and do some pretty crazy stuff! Well I guess my Dear Bestfriend forgot about that. So him thinking I'm being serious calls up Megan today and I'm on the other line with her she said "hey I'm gonna try and 3-way him in" I said "that's fine" well then her phone screwed up and she said she's call me back. She calls me back like 10 mins later going "who do you like", I was like "who do you think?", She said "well besides him" I said "no one why?" And then I remember she was on the other line with Cody and I said "OMG! are you talking to Cody!?!" she said " yeah and I was like omg listen to this and you have to believe me cuz it's the truth!" So then I explained how it was all just one big joke I was like drunk on mountain dew and how I was just kidding and that I never dreamed he's take me seriously and all that stuff!! She said oh well lemme call you back and I'll put you one 3-way after I explain to Cody what you were doing and stuff. So she 3-ways me and it actually worked. Well I guess now he's gonna beat me up. But to make matters worse his cousin saw what I wrote so now Cody's getting teased and stuff! Me, personally, I don't know Charlee so I could care less as to what he thinks. But seeing as how Cody has and image and stuff and Charlee is his cousin he cares alot more about what Charlee thinks. So yeah I'm gonna have a couple of bruises next time I see Cody. But it's Cody's own fault that he let Charlee read his texts, and that Cody was blonde enough to take me seriously! Oh well life goes on. Well that's my update. Leave me me some comments people.
Froggie
Mood:  Crazy and bored
Music: No music just the thought running through my head
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2005.05.05 22.43
Quiz
Mood: Because Of Everything
Music: The Thoughts In My Head
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2005.04.14 10.23
Shane Michael Griffin
This is an entry encouraging you not to drink and drive!! My friend Shane's brithday was yesterday..it was a sad time for everyone! Why..well because he wasn't around to enjoy it. He was killed in a drunk driving accident. He was on his way home from the movies and he was hit! He was in the hospital for 10 days and he finally past on. He would of been 15 yesterday. His mother was at home weeping for her oldest boy who would never enjoy another birthday! The man that killed Shane is Michael Belle. His sentencing was Tuesday (the day before his birthday), the court system said Michael would be in there for 5-15 years with possible chance of parole in 5 years! That's it..he gets to sit in prison for 5 years..that's five years Shane could of been in his first year of college by then! 15 years and he could have the family he's always wanted and he could of done great things! That man could have killed the next Great President for all we know!! And all he gets is 5-15 years! How messed up is that?!?! But there is one little thing about the man's sentencing I found quite deserving! Michael Belle cried through the whole thing. He feels guilty for what he's done. He knows he's destroyed to families plus he's changed many other lives! Shane's mother read a letter on how the accident has changed their family..she cried and so did Michael.. Shane's dad read a letter he'd written and Shane's dad couldn't even finish it off..someone else ended up finishing it for him because he was crying too much! Someone read a paper he'd written for a school project but I'm not quite sure what it was about. But it was his brilliant mind that he'd never get to use ever again! Michael Belle's mother got up on the stand and apologized for her son, saying she was very angry with her son, but that she stilled loved him and that because he is her son she would stick by him,but she still is angry with him! And she knows what he did was wrong! Michael Belle was crying, Michael Belle's mother was crying,Shane's mom and dad we're crying,everyone in the court room was probably crying! It has been a bad turn-out for a horrible situation!! But the man will pay for what he's done for the rest of his life! Well I gtg..comment and tell me what you think about drunk driving! Tell me honestly!! Bye Ya'll
Mood:  Because Of Shane's Death
Music: My mother talking and my dog
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2005.02.24 16.12
My Name Means...
| JENNIFER |
| J |
is for |
Juicy |
| E |
is for |
Enjoyable |
| N |
is for |
Nervy |
| N |
is for |
Nerdy |
| I |
is for |
Intelligent |
| F |
is for |
Flamboyant |
| E |
is for |
Enchanting |
| R |
is for |
Radical |
uhh..this is weird but i'm bored so i did it anyway..you might see more stupid quizes and stuff cuz i'm really bored!!...lol enjoy
Mood: Stupid Ohio People
Music: None
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2005.02.24 16.10
My Brain??
Your Brain is 60.00% Female, 40.00% Male |
Your brain is a healthy mix of male and female
You are both sensitive and savvy
Rational and reasonable, you tend to keep level headed
But you also tend to wear your heart on your sleeve |
ok..i guess this is me???
Mood: Stupid Ohio People
Music: None
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2005.02.24 16.07
Me 17..At Heart I Guess
You Are 17 Years Old |
17
Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.
13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.
20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.
30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!
40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.
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This definatly sounds like me!!
Mood: Stupid Ohio People
Music: None
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2005.02.24 16.01
I'm An 8..HeHe
Your Love Number is |
8
Your confidence and passion draws people in.
You've got a powerful personality, and you tend to take the lead in relationships.
Protective and dominant, you like to keep a short leash on your sweetie.
And that works out well for you, as long as you don't get with another strong personality! |
doesn't really describe me but ok..
Mood:  Uhh..No REal Reason
Music: None
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2005.02.23 15.20
HeHe..Me Boxer Puppy
You Are a Boxer Puppy |
Energetic, playful and good with kids.
You've also got a wild spirit that can't be trained or tamed.
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Mood:  So So Bored
Music: My Mother Talking To Me
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2005.01.04 15.41
Girls Rule and Boys..Well They Drool!!
Ok..I have guy friends and all..but sometimes..guys drive me crazii!! They like hurt people and then just move on to the next one..sometimes without even a second thought..it's disgusting!! OMG!! Plus theur nosey always up to no good..and just ugh!! Now I have a boyfriend and I have some guy friends..and those ones drive me nuts!! It's always conflict after conflict pain after pain..it dives ya nuts!!I'm so sick of all of them..even in the olden days the ruled the world..for the longest time we couldn't do anything!! NO0T EVEN VOTE AND VOICE OUR OPINIONS..now come on..how gay is that...and you notice how we've never had a woman president..huh...what's up with that!! GUYS NEED TO QUIT CONTROLLING OUR LIVES AND GO WATCH SPORTS OR SOMETHING...let us women run the country..since the guys seems to be doing a lousy jobs..what if women ran our country..and every other country..think of the way problems with be solved..better and faster I bet!! lol..don't get me wrong..i'm not anti-guys or anything..I'm just getting fed up with all of them!! One of these days since the nerds alreadii got their ultimate revenge..the women will get theirs too..whether i have to do it by myself!! That song by Christian Agularia or how ever you spell her name and Lil Kim..yeah they have a point..even if it's not exactly toward all issues..they do have a point!! They realized just like every other woman should..that guys rule our lives..no matter how much freedom we have they still run our lives..like our government and stuff..it's ridiculus..and I for one am tired of it!! I just had to get that out!! I for one just think our world would be a better place if women ran it!! Oh well just a though *sigh* not like I can do anything about it no anywayz...gimme a couple of years and see how things are!! Well should go..leave a comment please on your thoughts and opinions!! Girls Rule!!
<3333 Me
Mood:  content
Music: None
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2004.11.24 23.30
There Happy guys?
Well I finally got a live journal..took me forever to decide to make one..oh well i did now..everyone be happy!!! YAY!! Go me~!! Go me~!!
Mood: aggravated
Music: Tv in the background
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bloodytears615's journal
A lil Depressed Too
annoyed